Today, after days filled with some of my best friends in the world, I drove from San Antonio to Pleasanton. I was reflecting on so much that has happened over the past few days. Seeing Alissa, Julie, ladies from San Marcos, and Kami was SUCH a timely blessing. Watching Abby as she has gotten SO big and SO smart was such fun. Laughing and discussing with Jeff and Alissa was just what I needed. Julie and her nurturing spirit were a God send. Catching up with Kami after so long was reassuring that moving on doesn't mean losing people. This afternoon, after the last hug was shared, I made that last leg of the trip back south. It was the first time in about three days that I was able to be quiet and think about all that has happened over the past week - feeling everything that I have been protecting myself and others from seeing. It started raining and, much to my surprise, it was raining mud. It streaked my windshield and, as many times as I tried to wipe it away, it was still there. Even when the sun would break through for a moment, the windshield was splattered with the mud spots. I got frustrated and then suddenly overwhelmed with the urge to cry. I couldn't figure out why until I realized that the rain was a perfect physical representation of how I feel.
Right now, I feel like muddy rain.
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Well, Dana, I'm sorry that you feel like muddy rain. If you don't find a rainbow, maybe you can at least make some mud pies. They're pretty yummy! I love you and feel so blessed to get to see you for a while. Have a good time with your mommy and daddy.
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