Tonight once again reaffirms that I have absolutely NO control over what my life might look like and that our God likes to throw me curve balls. When this will stop surprising me, I will never know. At least now I can just shake my head and laugh about it. There are no longer "Why me!?" or overwhelming tears. It almost feels like I have a personal inside joke with God Himself!
This evening was our last study of the spring semester. Several of us were excited to hear about what the topic for this fall will be. We got there and much to my surprise, we find out that study will be quite different in September. Beth will be hosting an "Intro to the Bible" study for 250 ladies ages 18-25. Not only am I too old to go, the study is geared to beginners to the Bible (thankfully not me). In other words, there will be no study in the fall. We will pick up again in January of 2009. I just stared at the flier and started laughing in my head. Those of you who know what has gone on the past few weeks will understand why the irony just shot throughout the course of my entire body.
For the second time in about a week and a half, what I have envisioned for the fall is tilted and changed. Things I have grown to depend upon taken away. Granted, this turn of events is nowhere as huge as the break up but it is a change when I'm still trying to adjust to the other. It feels like God is slowly striping it down to just me and Him again. In many regards, I am full of anticipation for whatever He is planning because His ways are always higher than mine. At the same time, it makes me feel so raw and so helpless not having any say in my own life. Despite that feeling, I know that this is the time He does His best work.
So who can argue with that?
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3 comments:
That is ironic!
As you said, it seems that God is trying to strip it down to a relationship with JUST you and God. That is the way it should be,top priority, number one concern: my relationship with God.
Interesting! God sees you as a blank canvas, a place to create something beautiful in you/through you.
How does God know exactly what you need and how to show it to you perfectly? Why doesn't He work in "Neon" in my life, too? You are so blessed, Dana, to be able to see God so obviously working in your life. If only I could see Him so clearly.
HA!!!!
I have too many comments that too many would read,
so I'll shut up.
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