Because Love is Hard

It's been three weeks since I've been back in Cairo and I'll be honest - I'm exhausted.  The plane touched down at 5:30 a.m. on the 12th and since then, I have had two days of semi-rest.  Between One Wild Week (VBS meets day camp), newbie orientation, and the first week of prep back at school, it's been a lot.  Physically, mentally, and emotionally, it has tossed me around like a rag doll.  Every day as I get ready, I've been praying to just get through the day - help me prioritize, give me clarity of thought, grant wisdom with the time I've got today, don't let me be forgetful or drop the ball anywhere, help me not to overcommit, and let me love them well.  Overall, most of that has gone well (I think) but I question the last bit.

Let me love them well.

From my seven year olds to the newbies to my team to my friends - I question it all.  Did those little ones get the best I could give them coming straight from vacation?  Was I understanding and patient enough with the people moving to Cairo and beginning to adjust?  Have I chosen correct words and tone with my new team?  Have I helped them in whatever way I could?  And my amazing friends who have actually made me laugh and tolerated a brain dead Dana over the past three weeks - have I been as appreciative as I should have been and have I reciprocated?

Because here's the deal - love is hard.

Love is hard because it involves other people.  From seven to 107, people are hard to love. People don't listen.  People are stubborn.  People should know more than they do.  People hurt our feelings.  People demand our time.  People have expectations that pull us in a hundred different directions.

And I am one of those people.  Yet, I've been loved.

As tired as I've been, I've been loved well.  I have people who listen to crazy stories.  I have people who gently push me to not be set in my ways.  I have people who let me admit I was wrong about big and small things.  I have people who correct me when I'm harsh, short, or unkind.  I have people who let me invade their lives through their homes and their computers.  I have people who give of themselves and don't complain.  I have people who listen until I fall asleep and they don't get mad that I've passed out on them.  I have people who make me laugh and humor me.  I have people who pray with me and over me.  They are patient and kind and tolerant of me.  I have taken from them for three weeks straight and have not asked for anything in return.

They push me to be better and try harder because they embody love.

I want to be that.